The Odd-Sock Saga

You are unlikely to ever see my girls in a matching pair of socks. This is a fact.

I can't remember the last time I was able to keep one of them in a matching pair. I think there is some kind of strange sock vortex at work here, where one of a pair gets sucked into a black hole within moments of being placed on a wriggling foot. I genuinely have no more logical explanation for it. They just seem to vanish into thin air.

Goodness knows what people think when we go out of the house. There will be Angelica with one pink sock and one blue sock, while Natasha has one striped sock and one dotty one. Strangers must think we are a family of scruffy fools, but they have no idea how challenging it is to live in a household with a sock vortex, removing half the family's socks!

Half of the problem is the follow-my-leader mentality the girls have. When one of them does something, the other one has to copy. So one of them will remove a sock, then the other will remove a sock. One of them will hide their sock down the back of the couch, so the other one follows suit. Before you know it you have two bare-footed children and a whole drawer full of mismatched socks to contend with!

I have tried looking for the missing ones but they have clearly skipped off into a parallel universe. I have dug around between sofa cushions, around the back of furniture, in the toy boxes, you name it, I have looked there. Occasionally a sock will reappear in the most unlikely of places, like behind the toilet or on a shelf, with no apparent way of getting there. At a loss for any other explanation I think I am sticking to my sock vortex theory until proven otherwise.

So next time you see someone out on the street with a toddler wearing mismatched socks or a child who has one stripy foot and one dotty one, spare a thought for their family - they may be living in a sock vortex too!