Sunday 28 February 2010

Her first boo-boos

I had my first grazed knee to deal with on Friday.

My eldest has made it until almost 3 before taking her big tumble. She grazed one knee and three fingers plus the palm of the same hand, but she was incredibly brave and has taken her war-wounds in good spirits. I think she quite liked the whole plaster-application process, even if I ended up with plasters stuck to my arms, legs, bed and floor in the process. Well, little fingers and fiddly plasters plus a tired, distressed mother make for a poor plaster application technique.

Taking a pitiful look at her hand, she frequently mutters "Oh dear, oh dear, what to do?" which results in a big hug, lots of kisses and a bucket of sympathy from her parents. Yeah, it'll stop being cute when the wounds have all healed and the plasters are long gone, but for now my poor little soldier is a brave little soul, despite her collection of boo-boos.

Now I feel like a fully-fledged mother.

Birthday Time

Yesterday was my 30th birthday. We all took a trip to the coast for the day. It was the first time that the girls had seen the sea. They both took to it immediately, as though they had an in-built love of the coast pre-programmed into them before birth. Yes, we came away with a wellington boot full of pebbles that they'd insisted on keeping and yes, now we have to deal with an almost-3-year-old asking us every twenty seconds if we can go to the seaside again but it was a wonderful day and I couldn't have asked for better.

So now I can get on with the business of being 30. My 20s were a bit of a mixed bag. Some very good things happened and some very bad things happened. When I turned 20 I was nearing the end of my education and worrying about finding a job, and hating the job I'd eventually find. Now I'm turning 30 and I have a family, work that I love and a home I feel comfortable and happy in.

I am, however, entering the age of officially declining fertility and wondering whether we'll ever be blessed with another baby. I know I was pushing my luck to have my girls, but my family still doesn't feel complete.

That having been said, this is probably the most hopeful I have felt about a cycle in a long while - but don't tell anyone ;) I am testing at the end of next week and expecting BFNs, but if I got two beautiful lines it would be the best late birthday present of them all

Tuesday 23 February 2010

Motherhood

Motherhood isn't anything like I expected it to be. I'd wanted to have a child for so long, but all I'd heard about were the sleepless nights, dirty nappies and baby sick all over your shoulder. A lot of people I knew had many negative things to say about having children. If I had listened to the advice of the world then I probably wouldn't be a mother now.

There was something inside me that told me to ignore the negatives. That there was something more important beyond it. With the arrival of my girls, I found the hidden treasure no one dares to speak about.

I love being a mother. It is like nothing else on this planet. I love it so much that I long to add another member to the family and another piece to my heart. My body is not so willing to co-operate with me, but I'm working on her. She'll come round. Or maybe I just used up all my allocation of sticky dust with the two strong little girls who have just been splashing around in the bath and throwing plastic toy fish at me for the last half an hour.

With motherhood, every day is an adventure and no two days are ever the same. It's the kind of life I could never have expected to lead and enjoy, but here I am.

I'm loving every second.